Posted on July 13, 2010 - by Morgan Howard
Farewell to our Capt. Phil
Josh Harris and Johnathan Hillstrand (LA Times)
Tonight we say “farewell” to our skipper, Capt. Phil Harris of the F/V Cornelia Marie. I expect Discovery will use great sensitivity in telling the story of Phil’s last hours.
I guess in one respect we’re all in the same boat together. We all have similar feelings in regard to tonight episode of “Deadliest Catch”. My Mom and even Josh don’t really know what to expect on the show.
However, Josh and Johnathan were on the “Tonight Show with Jay Leno” last night and provided an idea of what is to come. During their segment of the interview, they did show a very emotional clip of the show. I guess this gives us some idea of what to expect. Also, before the Tonight Show, they spoke to a reporter from the LA Times:
Josh Harris, in Los Angeles this week for an appearance on “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno,” hasn’t watched Tuesday’s episode yet but says he will because he wants to make sure he said a proper goodbye. He was in shock during those last few days, he said, and doesn’t remember details that he now considers vitally important.
“It was hard to live it, and it’ll be really hard to relive it,” he said, lighting a steady stream of cigarettes on the rooftop of a Hollywood hotel. (He’s promised to kick the habit soon, but he’s too shellshocked at the moment, both from the death and the media attention now swirling around him). “I want to see those final moments of my father.”
Johnathan Hillstrand, co-captain of the Time Bandit and a close family friend in town with Harris for “The Tonight Show,” was at Harris’ bedside up to the end and said he hasn’t decided if he’ll watch the episode.
Josh is flying back from L.A. today and will watch the show here in Seattle. According to Johnathan’s twitter account he made a decision and will “be watching Deadliest Catch tonight”. Johnathan’s a great guy and has been a true friend to the Cornelia Marie family. Thank you Johnathan for all of your support.
Discovery Channel has set up a platform for Live chatting during the show here. Of course, we’ve always had the ability for real strong supporters of the Cornelia Marie to chat live at http://www.deadliestcatchfan.com - just scroll down to the bottom of the home page. I do hope they edit carefully and provide honor and justice to a good man.
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July 15, 2010
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Helen Avery said:
I watched Phils last epsiode on what would have been my mothers 74th birthday. I cried and cried, and never have I missed my mother so much, I sat by her bed and much as I could.I cant write anymore Im crying to much. Just know Jake and Josh that your father loved you.
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July 15, 2010
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Kim Michaud said:
Thank you Josh & Jake for sharing your father with us. I didn’t get the chance to grow up with my dad but at 18 I dedicded I was going to get to know him. I have truly apprecieted and will be forever grateful for the last 15 years I had with him before he passed away at 54 in Feb 09. Part of the reason why i got to know him is because of your father. Watching the show together or talking about it over the phone helped me relate to my father on a whole different level. He was so much like your dad that after he passed I continued to watch the show and be reminded of what a great man his was and how much he tried to be “perfect” and make for years lost. I think they both reached perfection along time ago and we were able to see that before they passed, I can only hope that they realized that before that final moment. Thank you for sharing your Dad, lives, boat and your stories. I mourn for the loss of you father as I still mourn for mine. Time does make it better but thankfully we don’t forget. May Phil live a little in all of us.
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July 15, 2010
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alberta said:
CAPT,PHILL WAS THE BEST AND WILL BE MISSED DEARLY,THE SHOW WILL NOT BE THE SAME,WILL STILL WATCH IT TO KEEP UP ON HOW THE BOYS ARE DOING.
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July 15, 2010
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steve fischer said:
I will miss watchin Phil I have been a fan from the begining and to the boys stay strong Jake I to am in recovery it will get easyer with time and just know that there is a better way to life without the drugs take care and keep crabin
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July 15, 2010
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Andrew Podymow said:
After watching this unforgettable episode, I was struck by two things: 1) how the Discovery Channel was outstanding in delivering the news, by keeping the dignity of Phil’s passing, Josh’s grief, and Jake’s departure in the most respectful way I have ever seen on television. 2) Phil’s final words to his sons exemplify the man he truly was under his gruff exterior: “I love you.” His sons deserved no less; Phil kept giving more until the end. Many men can lern much from these simple actions.
RIP Phil; you’ve earned it.
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July 16, 2010
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Kelevra Greywolfe said:
…i cant even…I just cant… begin to imagine for one having a man as good as phill for a father then for two…losing him..and to see that he told josh he loved him… and josh never heard ya know when i found out he had died i was relay hurt…but seeing it now and coming to the reality hes no longer around… i cant keep my composure and i start to tear up. even hearing the radio commercials id have to shut the radio off…
we miss you buddy…
fair winds and flowing seas
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July 16, 2010
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Stephanie said:
I wanted to thank you so much for sharing not only your lives but the life of your father thoughout these years, Lastnights episode was a tough one. I cried, it was so heartbreaking. Thank you so much for allowing us fans/viewers to mourn with you on the loss of your father. May he RIP. Captain Phill Harris.
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July 16, 2010
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karin l craig said:
Until Deadliest Catch I didn’t know a man like Phil existed. He was a 1 in a billion.
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July 16, 2010
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Cassie Medeiros said:
My heart goes out to the harris family, your father loved you very much…it was so apparent how much he cared. Phil Harris was a wonderful man and he will be missed so very much. I cried so hard watching his last hours… I cant imagine what you are going through…my sympathies to you and yours and i know that all will be well and he is smiling down on the entire fleet … Heres to Captain Phil
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July 16, 2010
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Carl WOmack said:
I lost my father when I was fifteen. He like your dad was 53 years old. I hope you guys charished every moment with your father. Everything wil be fine . It seems that you guys have pleanty of support. Best wishs and god speed.
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July 17, 2010
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Donna said:
Everytime I watch this last show…it leaves me feeling empty…like we were cheated out of such a wonderful personality. He was my favorite part of the show. I will miss him.
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July 17, 2010
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amber santos said:
sorry about your dad,you guy are like our ohana,watching every time is kool you make us laugh and now cry,we will miss him but you guys can do it look forward to see you guys on the boat,aloha phil.
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July 17, 2010
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Carol and Jerry Chwajol said:
My prayers are with you both Jake and Josh we will miss your dad on the show he was great. You all do great work.
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July 17, 2010
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Rebecca Miller said:
I wrote this poem for Captain Phil, who touched my heart with his relationship with his boys.
I was raised by a Single Dad who made many mistakes but showed a very tender and loving side to me that no one else on earth knew about.
We were blessed to see that side of Phil, a side no Dad (no matter how tough) need be ashamed of.
God keep you Jake and Josh.
“Her Answer”
(an origional poem by Rebecca Miller)
The Bering Sea
She sheds no tears
For all the Souls
O’er all these years
Who’ve given all;
Their hopes, their fears…
The Bering Sea
She sheds no tears.
The Bering Sea
Shows no reprieve
For those who mourn
And those who grieve
For ones she takes
And ones she leaves…
The bering Sea
Shows no reprieve.
You cry to her
Through ice and rain
“Why do you leave me
Hurt and pain?
What is it that
You stand to gain?”
And yet your cries
Are heard in vain.
She roars to you
with wind and wave
“My very best
I’ve always gave
So now I want
Your Loyal and Brave
In payment for
The Jewels I Save!”
“You take my strong
And leave the weak
The sick you pass
the rich you seek
You keep the bold
Throw back the meek
It’s always been
My best you seek!”
“And So…
I also do with you
I only keep the
Choicest few
The Lean, the Hard
Those Rare and True
And that will be
My payment due!”
The Bering Sea
She sheds on tears
For those She’s taken
All these years
For they’re the Best
Of all Our Kin
Who dare to say
Their “Fishermen”.
Thanks for letting me share this.
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July 17, 2010
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Joe Thomissen aka 664Freedom on YTube said:
Im a man without words instead of the talk I use my mind and my two hands.
On my link you`ll see what I mean, thank you my friend for showing us what it means to have a close family of joy and tears.
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July 17, 2010
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Trish said:
We watched the episode as did so many fans. It was difficult to see our favorite Captain so sick. We felt we lost a personal friend. We prayed for Captain Phil constantly along with Josh and Jake. Our prayers continue to include the boys every night. God bless the crew and all who worked close by. God bless you Captain Phil.
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July 18, 2010
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Amanda said:
I have watched Deadliest Catch from day one,I no longer get the discovery channel though.I go on there often to watch the shows but get aggravated cause everyone of them is in clips instead of the entire show in one video.So I never know what is a recent episode cause the date is not on them.I wish they would change it to show the show in its entirety with commercials like the other networks do.Will never stopping watching just have to search for them a little harder.All my prayers are with Capt.Phils family.
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July 18, 2010
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Robert Jones said:
I’d gladly send a few bucks to help buy out the Cornelia Marie,and help Josh and Jake out,and I’d even volunteer aboard the boat……donations..let Me know where to send the funds and I’ll kick in .
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July 18, 2010
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Wendy said:
Rebecca…thank you so much for sharing. That poem/lyrics/flow is amazing. Beautiful.
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July 19, 2010
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Nancy Bullinger said:
Just want to send good thoughts, prayers and strenght to Phil’s son’s. It is the hardest thing in life to loss a parent. You will never stop missing him, but you have to remember what he taught you and be grateful for having such a great dad who loved you.
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July 19, 2010
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Rhonda said:
Josh and Jake…thank you for allowing us the privilege of witnessing the love and respect you both have for your father. To be allowed to be a part of the last days with Phil is indeed an honor. I lost my father 7 years ago to heart disease and still think of him and miss him every day.
Be strong and remember all he taught you.
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July 20, 2010
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sheri said:
It is AMAZING to me how many people(inclueding myself) Capt. Phil touched. Did not personally meet him, but just from watching him these past years on T.V i have felt like on of ya’ll. Thank You Jake and Josh for letting all of us into one of the most personal and heart breaking time of your young lives. Just know, i have been a heavy smoker for 30 years and your father has inspired me to quit. God Bless!
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July 20, 2010
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Jim said:
God bless Capt Phil…Sorry to hear of your loss..He might be gone but he will never be forgotten. He touched my life as he did so many. Nothing but Respect for crab fishing men Its a hard life but very proud and close people. Wish you boys the best. Hope one day I can get the honor of meeting you all.
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July 20, 2010
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deb gray, nj said:
I’m so sorry to hear this…a hard job, a hard life and an early end. Jake and josh> keep strong. You have a wonderful strong community around you. Reach out for them…Sincerely, DG
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July 20, 2010
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john said:
Captian Phil brought color to deadlest catch he will be missed. Josh and Jake sorry to hear about your loss. Carry on your dads dream. Johnathan your a good friend to stick by Phil and watch over his kids. My hats off to you.
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July 21, 2010
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Janice Camp said:
Joshua and Jake,
We didn’t know your Dad like you did. You must think that “all these people” worshiping someone they didn’t truly know love him but they didn’t “know him”. We, the people of the United States, don’t worship him…we grieve WITH you. You have “done him proud” by being by his side both on the boat and in the hospital. Jake, it’s a short life so “kick” every bad habit..Josh, you too. Your Dad didn’t live “habit” free but that should be a lesson how NOT to live.
If you should decide to keep crab fishing, let it be YOUR CHOICE. If one of you decides to be part-owner, let it be for the passion you have NOT what you think your Dad would have wanted.
With love and grace,
Janice Camp
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July 21, 2010
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Richard said:
Capt. Phil. as well as the rest of the fisherman have been a pleasure to watch.You do a job like no other because it takes those rare few to do that, but like anything or anyone there is one that always sticks out, and that is what Phil did. Jake and josh thanks for sharing your dad with us it made me remember my dad tho he thought of himself as someone who failed us he actually taught us values that we hold onto. God bless and keep all of safe on the bering sea.
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July 21, 2010
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Teresa said:
Jake and Josh ur dad will be greatly missed…Here is just a little note from ur dad to u boys
To my dearest family, some things I’d like to say…
but first of all, to let you know, that I arrived okay.
I’m writing this from heaven. Here I dwell with God above.
Here, there’s no more tears of sadness; here is just eternal love.
Please do not be unhappy just because I’m out of sight.
Remember that I’m with you every morning, noon and night.
That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through,
God picked me up and hugged me and He said, “I welcome you.”
It’s good to have you back again; you were missed while you were gone.
As for your dearest family, they’ll be here later on.
I need you here badly; you’re part of my plan.
There’s so much that we have to do, to help our mortal man.
God gave me a list of things, that he wished for me to do.
And foremost on the list, was to watch and care for you.
And when you lie in bed at night, the day’s chores put to flight.
God and I are closest to you….in the middle of the night.
When you think of my life on earth, and all those loving years
because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears.
But do not be afraid to cry; it does relieve the pain.
Remember there would be no flowers, unless there was some rain.
I wish that I could tell you all that God has planned.
But if I were to tell you, you wouldn’t understand.
But one thing is for certain, though my life on earth is o’er.
I’m closer to you now, than I ever was before.
There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb;
but together we can do it by taking one day at a time.
It was always my philosophy and I’d like it for you too…
that as you give unto the world, the world will give to you.
If you can help somebody who’s in sorrow and pain,
then you can say to God at night……”My day was not in vain.”
And now I am contented….that my life has been worthwhile,
knowing as I passed along the way, I made somebody smile.
So if you meet somebody who is sad and feeling low,
just lend a hand to pick him up, as on your way you go.
When you’re walking down the street, and you’ve got me on your mind;
I’m walking in your footsteps only half a step behind.
And when its time for yo to go…from that body to be free,
remember you’re not going…your coming here with me…
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July 21, 2010
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Nancy Hutchinson said:
Thank you, Teresa and Rebecca for sharing your poems. What a gift you have been given and a heart to share that gift. I think Phil would be smiling.
He was a legend.
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July 21, 2010
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Chris said:
I miss him so much and don’t even know him personally, i can’t imagine how everyone close to him feels. What a loss. Love you Phil.
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July 21, 2010
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Patti Henington said:
Thanks go out to Teresa and Rebecca for the touching poems. You were given a great gift. For Josh and Jake, your father has graced me for the last 5 seasons with his passion for life, love for his sons and devotion to crabbing. He will always watch over you two. God Bless you both. Capt. Phil is greatly missed.
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July 21, 2010
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donna craddock in virginia said:
Dear Jake and Josh,
i have watched deadliest catch for so many years now and we have all watched u both grow up into fine young men.my family and i are so sad to have learned of your fathers death.i follow discovery.com everyday.and in feb when i learned of his death,that night we had a little goodbye of our own.our prayers and hearts are with u and always remember that he is always with u…peace and love be with u and ur family…donna and family
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July 21, 2010
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mary said:
Mr Tom Beers, what a remarkable job you did in handling such a sensitive and heartbreaking situation with Phils collapse aboard his boat, after the surgery and then with Phils desire to answer the call of the Bering Sea. The last scene we see of Phil is him looking to his right out the window, to see the snow falling and listening to the sea calling him. It was touching to see Josh and Phil talking about Phil not being there when the kids were younger and Josh telling him he taught him to be a man.
Thanks also to Phils first wife Mary, to share her stories and her life with the good captain. It was with joy to watch the younger days of Phil Harris, in the 70′s with the hair and a surprise, he played drums really well.
Is it possible to have one of Phils birdhouses?? Also, what happened to his cute little dog??
I wonder if anyone besides me would like to have the bracelet and the necklace Phil wore as his good luck charms..what a great way to remember him.
THanks also to all the friends of Phil who took time to share their lives with him along with the captains of the Time Bandit, the Northewestern and the Wizard. what a man to have such wonderful family, friends and also untold fans who loved him dearly and will remember him forever for being a part of their lives.
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July 21, 2010
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Stephanie Star Smith said:
Captain Phil’s first bout with the blood clots that ultimately took him from this world brought me into the Deadliest Catch universe. There was just something about this rough, tough crab fisherman being so very open and vulnerable in facing his own mortality that drew me in. And it was Captain Phil’s big personality, and even bigger heart, that kept me coming back, and instilled in me a desire to learn all I could about the rare and brave breed of men who go down to the sea in ships, and this even rarer and braver group who fought the Bering Sea for her crab-fishing treasure. The Cornelia Marie has been my favorite fishing vessel in the series, and shall remain so as long as she plies the waters of the Bering Sea.
I was so saddened to learn of Phil Harris’ death back in February, and so very sorry for his family and friends. Whilst watching Captain Phil wage, and ultimately lose, his brave battle has been difficult – and I know far less so for me to watch than it was for his sons and closest friends to live through – it has been testament to this incredible man. I feel privileged to have known him in this limited capacity, and my heart goes out to Josh and Jake; to Freddie, Steve and the rest of F/V Cornelia Marie’s crew; to Jonathan Hillstrand, who so obviously loved his great friend, and brother Andy, also a great friend of Captain Phil; and the rest of this close-knit brotherhood of captains and crews of the crab-fishing fleet we’ve followed on Deadliest Catch. I am very sorry for your loss.
To the Good Captain Phil: may you always have calm seas, the wind at your back, and full crab pots. You will be sorry missed.
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July 22, 2010
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Nancy Hutchinson said:
Mary – I was wondering the same thing about the necklace and bracelet. Maybe the proceeds could go to help Josh and Jake buy the Cornelia Marie.
Stephanie – I said it so very well.
It was sad but incredible to see the way the other captains ‘celebrated’ Phil – the Hillstrand’s fireworks, the passing of the Northwestern when leaving port, but most especially the Wizard’s leaving a full crab pot out at sea for Phil.
To Mr. Beers, Todd Stanley and all the Discovery Channel crews – Thank you for sharing the men with us, especially Phil. I believe it was you, Mr. Beers at the public memorial for Phil that said ‘the heart and soul of Deadliest Catch was found in the wheelhouse of the Cornelia Marie’. So very, very true
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July 22, 2010
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Veronica Ayres said:
Your fathers comedic personality will always be remembered. He is one of the major reasons I continued watching Dealiest Catch after the 1st time. You never knew what to expect but you knew it was going to be good. Both you boys did him proud at the end. Josh, you said so much to him without alot of words at his bed side, before you left to get his lucky necklace. Jake, you went to rehab and got help. You both made him very proud. Watching it, I learned just how close The Fleet was. You are all awesome men. Stay Safe & God Bless!!
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July 23, 2010
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Becky said:
omg i dont no were to start ive been watching phil sence the show started deadliest catch i loved watching phil and and his sons he was an awesome dad and a fisherman its so fun that he can go out and smell were the crabs are, and watching him and john get on his harley and ride in priugit sounds i’m from washington state? i were the hot spots are when ur in the back of a harley boy phil you live your life to the fullness, im going to miss you so much your the coolest guy i ever a hard working and a loving father my hart goes out to josh and jake we all love you guys and ower hearts go out to you both
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July 23, 2010
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PAULA said:
Jake and Josh, I would like to say how sorry I am for your loss. Phil was a great guy. I love the show and watch it with my 4 year old grandson, Dominic all the time. I know your father was very proud of you both. Thank you for sharing your best and worst moments. Discovery Channel did a great job. I look forward to keeping an eye on you boys. Stay safe as you begin your own journeys.
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July 23, 2010
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Kevin Harris said:
In May I lost my father to prostate cancer and watching the last episodes of this season and seeing Captain Phil pass away, Jake and Josh I knew exactly what you were going through. It was hard to watch. It’s been very hard for me moving forward after losing my Dad. We just have to take it one day at a time and know that our Dads are both enjoying a new life in a better place!
I think we’re distant cousins, the Harris clan, who knows. God bless you guys! You’re in my prayers.
Kevin Harris
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July 24, 2010
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Mary Cheyney said:
Josh and Jake,
My husband and I watch Deadliest Catch every week. Your Dad was a really tough man as he fought very hard to hold on with his sickness. We prayed for you all.I still pray for you guys everyday. We all are so proud of the way you guys stuck by your Dad while he was in the hospital. He never did stop smoking, my father died from lung cancer when I was 25 and he never kicked the smoking habit, its a tough addiction to go through. I really think you guys will make it in the fishing industry. Praying for you guys.
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July 25, 2010
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Valerie said:
I have been a huge fan of Deadliest Catch for quite a while now. Since I first saw it during it’s second season I have been hooked. Captain Phil was my favorite skipper because he reminded me a lot of my late step-dad Jon Rockwood. He was a commercial fisherman and spent much of his life working the crab boats up there in the Bering Sea. He would always talk about it and tell me lots of stories of his times up there. He looked a bit rough and could get rough if needed but he was a big marshmallow and teddy bear. He had been fishing since he was a kid with his dad and said it was in his blood. Watching Captain Phil always made it feel like my step-dad was there with me and I will miss watching him on a weekly basis this time of year. I send my warmest regards to Jake and Josh as well as the other crabbers up their because I know it is one big family up there.
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July 25, 2010
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karen said:
I came across the Deadliest Catch quite by accident about a month ago. I’ve been addicted since. I always wondered why catching crab was described as the deadliest catch….well, now I know after viewing the show. Captain Phil seemed like such a “cool dude”, so down to earth, and told everything like it was. As the shows went on, w/phil being sick, I was so hoping all would be ok. To Jake & Josh, continue your dads legacy, if you so wish, if not, I’m sure you dad would understand. Good luck to ALL the “Deadliest Catch” captains, deck hands & green horns (which I never heard that saying b/4 I watched the show).
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July 25, 2010
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LENA HEINMILLER said:
I lost my father 2 years ago– I know how you boys feel–I just want you to say that I wish nothing but the best for both of you and Johnathan you are a great friend–I find it amazing that you were not fishing and were able to be there for the boys–the Lord does work in mysterious ways–I hope that Jake gets the help needed so he can be the man he is ment to be MAY THE LORD DEEP YOU ALL SAFE
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July 27, 2010
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james e destefano said:
sorry about your dad its sad to see that he is gone but he will never be forgotten he is with you in spirt and in your dreams for ever and he is always with you out on the sea when you are working hard
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July 27, 2010
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Angela said:
Josh and Jake my heart goes out to you. I started watching the show later in the episodes. The Cornelia Marie and Captain Phil Harris were my favorite out of all ships out there. I pray for peace for the both of you in this time of grief. And I will continue to watch to honor Captain Phils memory and to see what the 2 of you carry on from his legacy. with much love Angela
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July 27, 2010
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Melisssa D. said:
Though I did not know Phil personally his passing broke my heart. As I watched the last few episode of the season I found myself with tears streaming down my face. It was as if I too lost my father. Phil was and always will be one of the best men whomever walked this planet and sailed these seas. I just hold onto the fact that Phil will never really be gone has long as there are those of us that have love for him. Love is forever even if people are not. Take care of each other boys. And remember, Dad is always watching.
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July 28, 2010
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don brewer said:
ive watched deadliest catch for the past few years now..i always wanted to see what was going on with the cornelia marie..capt phil was a rough man..stern but fair..intimidating but gentle..he was, in my eyes, a great man and father as well..jake and josh, your father will always be looking down on you guys and keeping and eye on you to keep you safe on the cornelia and the bering itself..PHIL YOU CAME IN MY HOME MANY NIGHTS AS WELCOMED AS MY OWN DAD..IN MANY WAYS YOU REMIND ME OF HIM..GOD SPEED TAKE CARE..MAY YOU REST ETERNALLY IN PEACE…SINCERELY,,,DON BREWER,,,U.S. ARMY VETERAN 101ST AIRBORNE DIVISION
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July 31, 2010
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Bill said:
Josh and Jake – I lost my dad at 26. He was a rough one too. I absolutlely loved watching your dad b/c he reminded me of mine. I never told my dad that I love him and I regret it every day. Phil heard that from you and you heard it from him. For some reason, that helped me.
Make him proud.
On the smoking, just decide to stop and don’t let yourself make excuses. you’ll do it.
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July 31, 2010
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Rita said:
Captain Phil was a great man you are greatly missed. Watched him weekly sometimes more. Josh and Jake you are very fortunate to get to know your father the way you did. You will be the men he was. I’ll miss seeing him weekly.
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August 2, 2010
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Pamela said:
I am an avid fan of the show and my two favorite boats were always cornelia marie and the time bandit// Capt phil was so awesome and so full of life. my prayers go out to the boys stay strong and know that he will ALWAYS be with you.
to Jonathan Hilstrand you absolutely rock as a true friend. what you did for phil and his boys will never be forgotten it takes a special special man to stand by someone as a true friend as you did for phil. his family esp his boys will never forget you for this.
Capt phil we loved you and you eill be greatly missed by all!!!! The bible verse that i gre up hearing and the sea shall give up theirs as the land will forever have a different meaning for me now